Tuesday, 1 March 2016

You Say Oprah

She asked me if I like opera,
I replied, I prefer post rock ambient electronica.
No! she shrieked, I mean Op-rah, not opera!
You know, the world's biggest celebrity of America?
Op-rah who? I enquired
Oprah who? OPRAH! OPRAH Winfrey?!
Oh. Pee. Arrhh. Ehh. Aitch. Oprah!
Wow, you really think

when people say Oprah, they actually mean..op-e-ra?
Well, it was nice meeting you..

So umm..I must be going..
She waved her arm around the mezzanine lounge,
Taking in the other waiting omega male dating clowns.

I nodded,
Her eyes scored me nought,
The bartender offered me a vodka,

And a double-take thought:
That has to be the speediest speed-date thumbs down
I've ever seen in this town,
Well at least she will remember you now.

Seconds out,
And it was time to meet another speed datee;
I asked her if she likes Oprah,

She said she did and asked the same of me,
Oh, I said (smarter now) I prefer re-runs of Gerry Springer.
She jumped off the bar stool - another pull of the trigger,
And the bartender poured me a triple..