Sunday, 16 July 2017

And The Heretics Weep

Dark mirror dragon-kings black swans
Your shadows lick the mural beam
Bathe most caves and cloak the flame..

The Magi of Pipers
The spell casters' prescience
Incantatory grand designs murmur..

Nothing of More in three in two in one..
The chambers echo canned echoes
Grim shepherds whistle and tails wag dogs..

The heretics weep..
They have peeked at the Illumined masters
And their stark pyro source material..

The bewitching flame
the moths mark themselves
The limpid amber swims up liminal..

And the heretics weep..

Wednesday, 12 July 2017

Heroically Manfully Ethically Theosophically Pot Noodle

Wandering the laptop aisles

A customer service suffragette enquired
MayIhelpyou One phrase    as     OneWord
What kind of laptop are you looking for..

One that is for poets I stated
Startled she backed away and glanced up at a security camera
I will leave you alone she replied a little hurt
Sorry to have bothered you
Oh no it's okay I reassured
There probably isn't any such thing anyway..honestly..

She stop-gazed
So..may I help you with anything else..

Go on..she encouraged
Would you help me..uh..
with some of the..
..shame and guilt I feel..
I feel utterly bewildered....defeated
And I'm so spiritually sluggish
And I still don't know what to do with my life
And I still don't know what to do with my previous lives..

Oh that! she waved an arm dismissively
So you're not a real professional poet

You don't earn from it..


After another pause
Lilted such a life-affirming flat-line rainbow Mona Lisa smile
You don't need a laptop then do you 
You can just use your....hand..

Yeah I'll do that..

Time for a commercial break 

I'll see you on the other side..


I wandered the shopping centre
As the cosmogryal wandering shopping centre
collapsed my annihilation of self around itself
Shopping centres walk with our legs

  Fukushima dream-landscapes hammer blizzard miles     

No me neither

I have no idea what I meant there
It's a poem
Or is it..

Standing there walking here standing there
I thought she reminded me of  an ex who dumped me

after catching me looking confused
while grappling heroically manfully ethically theosphically even
with the cooking instructions on a Pot Noodle

Although to be fair to her
I also once blew up her organic strawberry blancmange
by placing it on defrost in the microwave
And to make matters worse
when the blancmange exploded I didn't notice
Because I was listening on headphones full blast
to a tune similar to the one below
I was wearing her chiffon dressing gown too
Although that bit's not important..
Or is it..

She tasered me in the head with her earthed dildo
And as I stirred conscious on a boat
She threw me into the river
And when the River Police rescued me
and dumped me on the shore in front of her
as I choked up shells and a mermaid's necklace
She tutted

 She tutted and sighed
all folded arms she was
the ultimate in weaponised female body-language form
Is this why I pay my taxes she frowned..

Yes the customer service suffragette reminds me of her
So in other words I think I'm in love..

Happy ending

Saturday, 17 June 2017

Now That's What I Call War On Terror Music (Volumes 22-33)

Let's go
Put out for bunny ears
Fire up the hugs the tears
Book the stadium
Shout luv ya
We won't give in
Then sing your song
About being fucked so hard
you can't walk
to screaming eight-year-old children
                         eight-year-old children..
Earnest gurning saplings
And remember
Never give in to terrorism..

Beta kittens with floppy ears
Warm the cockles
Intern clicks of fear
Roll out dappled stock heroes
We always need those
Feel the tingles
From your head to your toes
Another hashtag
Virtue signal
infantilising palliative antidote
Don't be a spoil-sport
Stoke the rolling Cope Machine
Groin marine positivity please..

Triffidal flowers drop-ship macramé hands
Autotune tears align
Never allow a good crisis to go to waste
The limo engine purring discreetly

Candle in the Wind ditties
And as we bomb Libya
Ariana Grande/A Grande Arena
Dangerous Woman
Would you spare one song for Tripoli
Or Baghdad
Hillary sing for Benghazi
Or at least walrus a missing person's appeal
Has anyone seen Eric Braverman
Whisper a lament for Seth Rich's arkancide
Cry like you mean it..

If you can't manage a song
Could you spare a middle eight
Or a chorus
Or the last few seconds to fade
Or spare the virtual hole in the middle of an mp3..

Saint Theresa
Cut another deal with Saudi
Then frolic through wheat fields
Feel naughty waving pyramid quids
Clutch for dear life
your chocker necklace
Skull and Bones
And a pint of squid
A delicate balance
A delicate balance..

Spare one lullaby for the Yemeni Houthis
Or the White Helmets' beheaded
Let's have a minute's silence
For any friendly fire incident
On any given Friday
A wedding
A funeral
Another bombed hospital
All for our children their kids are goats..

Teflon empaths..
If you can't manage a silent minute
How about a few seconds
Even if only inside your head
You can carry on talking if time-poor
'tis the thought that counts..

And a silent word with your intelligences
The assets flip
Get hip to the bait and switch
What a Watch List
Battalions of Mr al-Baghdadi Batmans
Legacy phantoms
Now available in cans
In-Extremis Man
The new fragrance for the edgy man
Slipped under the radar

Slap on a ribbon
This one is for our children
Beta sex kitten bunny ears
Monarch sired seer
Crisis management goes hot
Alice in Wonderland
White Rabbit
Slytherin 6
Chess board alter
One Love massive attack
Harry Potter cannibals
Presstitute managers
An ex-prime minister exhibits his shed
Glistening various shades of bone ash..

And the flowers
Sentiments waxed flex fitter
Soundbite Molotov ziggurat
reflect flitting moondogs..

Flames of electronic candles
Click off
To save power
As a lamp post light flickers on
mistaken for the sun..

Beneath the nuisance rain
the parched memorial
The shrink-inked words
Some heartfelt
Frightened numbed
Blur into Rorschach tests..

The wrapping can be recycled
The flowers churned to compost
The sentiments monetised to numbness
Celebrity cash cow tweets
One Love
Hand in glove
The War on Terror love train

The entertainer shouts luv ya
So you shout luv ya
She wants to know
If you are alright
    even the ones at the back..
She wants you to feel better now
She felt your pain
She felt your pain..

A community of atoms fuses together
For a few hours more
Then everything shall return
to the way it was before..
                  ...luv ya..see ya..

Please close the door behind ya
And exit..
                stage left..

The concessionary stalls are outside..

Monday, 22 May 2017

The Welcome Party

A celebrity
Takes a selfie
With her photographer
Who takes photos of her
             taking her selfie..

Her summer scene perhaps green screen
Lead-lining her possibly CGI body..
She might be real..

The photographer frames her
into selfie artifact
Her tether form
Her ether quintessence
             slips on this new force field
                       fans the siphoning blizzard
And everywhere
Songs of sirens echo
Ringing theremins...

I shall float on a broken window
Imagine how we might look through there
My longboat of mud and broken window
With a broken window sail
Let us fare
Through seas of ether we seek..

And many children as adult children
Dance and fuse with the mirrored shellac
As reflected phantoms swoop and glide
They sail down..

And plenty keep watch from the shoreline
The welcome party
So the cargo cult know they have arrived
Propelling the new myth-dream
Fit for Purpose
The broken window looking-glass gaze
Has it ever shone so fair..

Wednesday, 10 May 2017

Asteroid Haiku

i did what i did,
whatever that was
tracks, times, sleep, light, things..

**    *       ******     *      ***      *

you have two messages

..wonder how old is that tree..

that cloud
i am sure
it has been that exact shape
somewhere else before.. you haven't submitted that form yet..

she always looks angry
she drinks truck loads of camomile tea

[god cannot find itself anywhere on google maps
although monetised..]

i saw a nun with an iphone
although not the latest model..

hi..yeah. i said
submit the form
or you lose those expenses
yeah cheers..

what the heck is that up there
it really seems to be getting closer..

did i switch off the cooker..

**   *        ******     *      ***      *

i did what i did, 
whatever that was
tracks, times, sleep, light, things..

Wednesday, 26 April 2017

It Was Similar To The Resurrection Oh But Not The Same

it was similar to the resurrection
oh but not the same..

i overheard a mother qualify and explain
something about their
miraculously risen cat..

the mother zoned-in on my baffled expression snagged
and within her reflection she gently flung 
she culled and hulled and duffed my air
then away into the supermarket she burned
her piety affronted 
and there morphed aglow 
an angry mumsnet phantom
i her uninvited shock-absorbing defibrillator..

sunk manlessly skittering
i careered into another supermarket
i thought it would be best
i slipped as sloth 
on my dropped pavement gaze deflected
an unappealing squirm of tangled beam
a blinking bevelled-edge bonanza
of furrowed dots and dashes

rolling caterpillar eyebrows gone awol..

this street tableaux
a beached rolling wave unfurled
an unabsolved crashing space cadet
as marble-eyed magi liquidised cash-back
a blown-shrunk tumble-weed unredeemable consumer-human
hosed down to my melted meme aspect
a microwaved picasso meaning-gleaner
i retreated 
bleeping 'neath a belisha beacon..

my mind wasn't looking its best
in other words
still digesting
such an upper-cut curve 
of gnomic intervention
and worse 
caught mangled in the musing act
higher moggy theosophy 
obviously above my calling
above my resonating aura
no hope for esoteric cognisance
for epiphany no gears..

it was similar to the resurrection
oh but not the same..

burgled soul burger-flipped
the spaceman budgerigar
you don't want fries with that..
please re-corkscrew should you receive..

it was similar to the resurrection
oh but not the same..

so what kind of moggy is this
does it perform miracles
or does it deign only to sit there
testing the new faithful 
the old messianic 101 way..

okay so
it was similarly resurrected
but not the same..
so what were the key differences
i wondered
as alien long-life noodle aisles 
wandering unravelling
a knitting ball would never ponder me..

it was similarly resurrected 
oh but not the same..

was the fluffy one crucified
..should i call the rspca..
         ..oh but perhaps It has forgiven them..
with no device for non-divine intervention
i resolved i must know my place
sadly one of the heathen brethren..

i looked but could not find
the cat food
which is okay
for i have not a cat
and yet of the holy moggy
i confess i still yearn to believe
that some myths 
must be more than mere mythology
for the gentle purring 
and laying of paws
this cruel world well and truly needs..

Monday, 10 April 2017

Escape To Easter Island A Gated Community

we're waves formed..

a fragmenting sentient
my will slight 
so my flimsy grasp 
precognition shards mill muscle memory 
my deja vu muse 
machine-learns a rescue plan
like johnny cash in a time slip
i walk the spiral..

and if it's okay with you
i might wave at you you
as you walk your spiral..

human jet stream silver fish treacle-dart 
easter island statues lock on milk floats 
intravenous selfies invacuate
unribboning ice cream icon screens pass..
go on..pass..

i am the force 
i gated community
the smaragdine sky isotopes twinkle

my inside-i forms a line
folding squeezed inside this vase
a translucent force field of candy-floss resistance 
nevertheless trapped and mapped..

eye slings
new lamp post lights iridise toothpaste caterpillars
wi-fi vectors fry trickling children 
and when 5g arrives the unborn shall be..
more things than things
to pipeline-transaction
pinged pliable things to solarise
by gamine geek soul-pirates
novellas of an almost-children

easy gold oiling over 
our lack of prescience our future sold 
for all but the few..

elon musk our god emperor bow down
and your smart fridge an informer
your medical records curator 
your cold-called name a radioactive husk
a spiller
you won't get that back in the tube

and a new lord shall call this
the internet of things..

i am the gated community
a dissolve of one part crash test dummy 
one part driftwood druid
side-car salmon owned by the inverted us
the limbic system prone psyche..

a drone throws me a frisbee
i throw it back
and my biometrics are tagged eternalised

whatever my thoughts your thoughts
an artificial intelligence air conditioned in the desert
mulls every us all aspects as silent as the sphinx
the firmament cracked caves transposition
a new gilded cage for the gated awaits
like so for the one who knows..

easter island statues ~ mirrors
a flash yoga stand-in
ten or a thousand years
a selfie to the stars..

our very soul snapped in the fish-eye 

jesus stands stilled in a dead coral reef
also for him i cannot phone a friend..

Wednesday, 15 March 2017

I Lost The Thread

i lost the thread

yet for almost four seconds 
i apprehended what i was trying to convey
not boasting here
i lost the thread
but for a few seconds i almost made it..
i almost got myself..

i lost the thread
it's not on the carpet
i looked inside the washing machine
even gazed in the mirror
shag-pile misconceptions bloomed cactus
a bubbling dansak soul interrogation
offered no luciferous spheres to stravage
the waiter deliberately smashed up the papadums
it was him officer..
but it was him it was him
look no eye contact..

and yes it flashed there momentarily
then gone
like an elusive freak mouse 
waving some cosmic entanglement tickling stick
glinting blinding
an almost revelation
almost revelation in italics
like this almost revelation
almost revelation in italics hyphen
like this italics-hyphen
then gone..

i am in my balloon now
floating with the clouds
i have my cloud-sculpting power tools
what about that cloud over there
do you see it
i think i'll sculpt that one
it's not mine anymore..

i will chisel the cloud oblong
then sit in the bath and wait..
and if nothing happens
i will chisel the cloud oblong
then sit in the bath and wait..

it was probably a lazy poem
the kind that never offers to do the dishes
they just don't care do they
could you imagine a poem working
this one clearly isn't
poems only work like cats
or am i being poemist
poemist in italics like this in italics like this..

i lost the thread..

Saturday, 4 March 2017

Scarcity Perverts

the publisher turned back to his partner
after gazing through
and through the pyramid glass sky vista
pool cuing with his thumb and fingers all the little birds
imagineering them dropping
splitting open the human ants below
like silent harpooned kamikaze meteorites
beaked smart guided feathered flint rapiers
he chuckled at his hitchcock 


he shook his head
our bedazzled basement-dwelling concoction 
of electric word-noise 
~ sold ~ and how ~ 
wow ~
yes exactly.. 

and  rest assured
our hired def-con earnest 
consumes minds
yet their shielded values
 ~  those real strongly held ones..
well here's a discreet veil..for the mummified
what a foil..

her consumers

they've double-front soul lobotomies 
her woeful gurning so perfectly conjoins
they can't see through it
and they are the ones that matter 
and they are more than okay with it
~ it's all's all good..they're delighted
our focus groups have told us so
over and over..
                        ~ they love her..

and thnk about this

if her coffee ad picks up a creatives' award
then so much the better
we all receive the kudos
and our copywriter songstress laureate
her doe-eyed sweet gaze
shall bask in that tinsel reflected starlight once more
she'll earn 
no doubt
~ plenty more
she is now the headliner in all the sjw arenas isn't she
organic fair trade warrior..yeah i've seen her on the road..
tea bags sourced entirely from organic cocaine cartels..

her outlier brand recognition we've already firmly established

on that telethon celebrity gang-bang
pumping prime-time her bling verse plink-plonk twattery 
don't quote me on that
shameless wasn't she

using a starving kid as an empathy prop
that'll do ~ kerching..
                                     my new album is out next week
                                                            ~ by the way..
                        ..but let's remember what is important here
                   don't go to the pub tonight
            look at this starving kid
      for a while longer
and think about ~ it
  that's what she said 
      ~ it...
                               oh and..
then she finished her peroration with
the classic by-the-way
      also my book is out next week 
                                             by the coincide..
        with my album which is also out next week

 i ~ we

call that sweet poetry..
                       ~ yeah..

                    and all. 

    our play book.
wouldn't you say..

~ poetry ~ earnest songwriter ~ album ~ telethon ~
kerching ~ yeah

her pr propagandist makes bernays look like gandhi

~ he's wonderful
not gandhi
i mean her pr manager

so let it be written
we shall all bathe in our songstress's reflected fake liberal glory..
and all the fake liberals won't call us on it
we make them feel good..
we make them feel great..
let's make fake liberals feel great again..
all the hillary clintonistas
they are the new all-important demographic..
collective noun victimhood..

and for all of  this new fake whirlwind
we must thank the lord..

we ~ her ~ starving kids ~ that

and yet there's no danger of us being perceived 
as scarcity perverts here..
apart from the cynics 
so they don't really matter
not really..

he pondered his driftwood light bulb profundity

while shooting at another three birds..
then he said
..and we're willing on our actress
she should never need a real job..

i'm talking about our star here
not the telethon starving kid..~ she needs a real job..right now..

..soo artistically valid

whatever that might mean
as valid as that annoying italian opera character 
for go compare if you ask me 
don't quote me on that either
she's ours..

and we will remind them

she has a heart
one pence of each copy of her book will be donated to a..
..i dunno..think of something..

.. ~ simon cowell.. 

i quote our biography
a genius about music..
these people those people
they probably think artistic integrity
is a brand of kitchen appliances..
  you're frowning

so what gives..

his partner was about to explain

but he held up his hand conceding 
~ no you misunderstand 
                                  i know...
look if it makes you feel better
see her as our gateway drug poetry product
and all while she is selling her tat ~ ours
we keep the faith 
and so shall she
so be positive
you never know
they might end up buying our real hard verse stuff
the dead ones
the ones who wrote their words

it might work..

he fell silent

and did the okay sign in front of one eye
he aimed and shot down another two birds
with a sniper's cold precision..

he concluded

we need those people to take her very..
and her tailored angst-whimsy is..
just perfect..


Sunday, 12 February 2017

Noblesse Oblige Cocoon

multi-talented no misogynist
a tortured genius the world of empathy beneath understands
a punch provides his hit
and for madam
the placatory box of chocolates
his calibrated rebalance of the yin and yang
the usual dance..

ambassador you are spoiling us..

a seer a prophet an artist
her eye socket
so she fell down the stairs again..

i should have been more careful
she whispered
and the interviewer she nodded
he smiled
she's all fingers and thumbs..

he has an aura
the interviewer blushed
as he escorted her to the car
they exchanged phone numbers of course
his better half looking on from the window
then after a beat or so..
                                   she turned away..

you spying on me again
never mind
just leave me in peace
and before you ask
no we really don't need to talk about this
there is no
my patience is wearing thin..

as well we know
another wise man once said
something about the the anger of a patient man..

a beat..
she gathered her courage
yes he barked
it's your turn to make dinner..she said

Tuesday, 7 February 2017

Interweb Counselling 101

So I'm sending you these instant messages
As I really don't want you to take this as personally
as you would emails
Or text messages from me
I'm thoughtful like that..

These eye-emms are only thoughts
As these are just my thoughts
Don't take my thoughts about you too personally
Unless you wish to
Which is fine by me..

These are only 
Thinking of me a bully
Or a troll
Is infantile
And childish
So I don't care

Would you say that to my face
You know what would happen if you did
Just sayin'..

So you can ignore this
- after you have read it
Entirely your choice
These are only my thoughts about you
This isn't real..

So stop treating them as if they are
People can be so sensitive
Toughen up
Live in the real world..

Do you think you're talented
You need to sort yourself out
And btw 
I know people
Trust me on that

I can find out where you live
Just sayin'..

Tuesday, 24 January 2017

Sylvia Plath's Silver Fox

sylvia plath
oh how you made us laugh
if only you had used a microwave oven

ted hughes
like all great poets

you were great with women weren't you
and to be fair
you also wrote a really good poem about a fox
and you got laid many times because of it
and apparently three of your loves killed themselves
and then you published some poems about one of them
but not the other two because they were just exes

and it was very well received
i mean the collection
not the suicide in question..

and you told your side of the story
and the critics mostly felt sorry for you
even a feminist plathist jihadist 
and they wished you were still alive
so they could tell you
they had rehabilitated you

an amazon reviewer said this
in their five star review
arrived on time and was exactly as described
and another reviewer said
in their five star review
i bought this for an old lady it was her 100th birthday
a one star review said this
i thought it was the book and it wasn't and now i can't seem to cancel this purchase..

i'm off to write a poem about basil brush right now